Friday, 5 February 2016

The social media illusion.


 


The image people see of me on the Internet is not the full story of me; my personal social media accounts, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram are my way of communicating with friends all over the UK, as well as some of my closest friends who are 1000's miles away. I want them to know that I’m having a good time and that I’m achieving things despite my illness. But when times get hard it can be one of my ways of reaching out for a virtual hug.

http://tse1.mm.bing.net/th?&id=OIP.Mc01f8e48bcbd56031e4c8059c49a2821H0&w=300&h=300&c=0&pid=1.9&rs=0&p=0

But what you see is all an illusion; social media is (in my humble opinion)all an illusion. For me as a young (ish) person living with 9 long term illnesses it's even more important to look like I am still living a life worth living. I'm not changing who I am or what my life looks like by what I say on my social media accounts I just cherry pick the best bits to share!!!


I only post pictures I like of me: it's not rocket science is it!? Who would post pictures of themselves that they are not happy in?


Makeup makes me look half human on days in reality with cluster headaches this is what  I look like - death warmed up!

'You look so well'

Yes,  I went to a wedding at the weekend, yes,  I looked well (did I mention how amazing my makeup bag is?!) and yes I'm smiling. That’s what you saw from the pictures and posts I did over the weekend.

 I forgot to post the picture of my sitting on the floor of the disabled toilets in my new pretty dress crying for an hour, using my oxygen hugging the cylinder like it’s the only person in the world who understands me.  I didn’t write a post about the searing agony in my head, or that my friends I’ve known for years don’t understand my life or my  illness and how upsetting it is to answer the ‘so what do you do?’ question, again and again, with no answer!

You look so well is a really hard one; I want people to think I look good of course I do! But I constantly interpret that as ‘I thought you were too sick to work… you don’t look sick’

Of course I don't want my exterior to represent what's going on inside my body: But sometimes I think maybe people would understand me a little better.

So yes we are lucky to see friends, but we pay for the privilege, physically and financially.

My fatigue levels are like nothing I've ever known. For every 'good day' that you see on social media, I am then in bed for at least the equivalent amount of time. We just had a short 4 day break away and I spent a week in bed afterwards (worth it though)

I've learnt to be proactive and productive on these recuperation days. My bed transforms into an office like the Tracey island toys of my youth! So you may see me respond to emails or tweet or post on facebook.  I often spend these days fiddling with Instagram filters making pictures of my days in the real world look even more fun and beautiful that they were... All of this online activity and you wouldn’t know  that these are some of my worst days!

It's hard to convey how you feel in 120 characters or a Facebook status. It's even harder in a single photo. Not just for me, for everyone.

I want people to see that I'm still functioning (just about!) that I still make time for my friends and family and that I care about their achievements, birthdays, babies and our friendships.

I don't want to waste my energy and their Social media feeds talking about this depressing illness. I try to mention it only when something good has happened and we have achieved something.

My friends might point out something different now; but I hope I present the positive side of Katie on my social media. This is my goal; I need somewhere where my life is normal... Ok not normal that's a bit too much to ask, but more like the rest of the world.

But the message of this blog is that it is all an illusion. Like a swan I may look like I'm swimming through life, having fun and seeing friends but underneath I'm kicking like hell in the biggest fight(s) of my life to stay alive. I don't want to talk about it, I want to carry on talking about the good side of things but don't forget it's not all there is... So please don't judge me.

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