From the outset I'm not wishing to
cause controversy with this post I too have lost people well before the time
was right. It’s just what came to my mind… which is what this is all about.
I read an article or two recently about someone in the public eye who was knowingly at the end of their days. In their mid 60's this was premature consequently painful for both them and their loved ones.
But I couldn't help thinking, what's worse? To lose your life at 65 having lived a full and happy life or live to be 100 having had so much of your daily life destroyed by pain and illness since your 20's.
I'm not saying for one minute that I would be better off dead than living the life I have for the last 10 years, but the thought of living to be 100 with this illness scares me to my core.
To be living the life my wife and I dream of now for the next 30 years, with careers and financial security as well as children and grandchildren of our own... I'd take that, even if it meant dying at 65.
It's the hand you are dealt, I know that. I can't swop or change it any more than I want or deserve the hand I got. But one thing I do know is that this individual bravely facing the end of her days has the attention of the media, raising awareness and money for cancer charities, she has the love, empathy and compassion of the nation... most people haven’t heard of the illness I have.
I'm not asking for the empathy of a nation... Just the people I meet... To understand the daily pain I've lived in for 10 years, the utter devastation it has caused in my life, the bargaining I do in my head with my god that I could have a something else instead... Something that can be cut out, fought with at least the chance of victory.
This lady facing her final days in the public eye was brave and courageous but sadly her time came even sooner that she had hoped for. I hope she is pain free now.
I read an article or two recently about someone in the public eye who was knowingly at the end of their days. In their mid 60's this was premature consequently painful for both them and their loved ones.
But I couldn't help thinking, what's worse? To lose your life at 65 having lived a full and happy life or live to be 100 having had so much of your daily life destroyed by pain and illness since your 20's.
I'm not saying for one minute that I would be better off dead than living the life I have for the last 10 years, but the thought of living to be 100 with this illness scares me to my core.
To be living the life my wife and I dream of now for the next 30 years, with careers and financial security as well as children and grandchildren of our own... I'd take that, even if it meant dying at 65.
It's the hand you are dealt, I know that. I can't swop or change it any more than I want or deserve the hand I got. But one thing I do know is that this individual bravely facing the end of her days has the attention of the media, raising awareness and money for cancer charities, she has the love, empathy and compassion of the nation... most people haven’t heard of the illness I have.
I'm not asking for the empathy of a nation... Just the people I meet... To understand the daily pain I've lived in for 10 years, the utter devastation it has caused in my life, the bargaining I do in my head with my god that I could have a something else instead... Something that can be cut out, fought with at least the chance of victory.
This lady facing her final days in the public eye was brave and courageous but sadly her time came even sooner that she had hoped for. I hope she is pain free now.
Grab hold of every laugh, smile and tear you
have ever had and hold on tight, because it's the memories we take with us.
There are days that I would have begged her to take me with her, but I'm hanging on here with my loved ones, waiting for a cure...
There are days that I would have begged her to take me with her, but I'm hanging on here with my loved ones, waiting for a cure...
You never know... If I wait long enough.
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